some time in the future you’ll be on your way to a restaurant. a piano will fall down in front of you and squish the tip of both your shoes without hurting your toes. then you’ll be refused service for improper footwear. people almost never stand exactly symmetrically, so your feet need to be different sizes so the fronts line up.
I’d like to know what the plan was, giving me the ability to grow a neckbeard only on the right side.
Now I’m worried that I’m inadvertently monsting all the time! But would that be objectionable? Braxton seems to think so, but he doesn’t even know what monsting is. Maybe I should worry that I’m not monsting enough! To monst, or not to monst: I’m at the look for such information.
Cold: Made from the very few Russian potatoes that don’t become vodka.
Bern: Since I live in Portland (where you can get into any restaurant wearing Pringles cans on your feet), I know I’ll only have to deal with this frightening scenario when dining out of town. Guess I’m staying home forever!
Teddi: I mean, there are only so many things that people need to do more often, like drinking water, washing hands, reading Mountain Time, MAYBE exfoliating, etc.
But there’s all kinds of things that they shouldn’t be doing at all. Murdering, cannibalizing, throwing recyclables in the trash, ordering steak more done than medium, texting while driving, sexting while driving, texting during sex, driving during sex, over-exfoliating, pronouncing “etcetera” “exetera,” etc.
Odds are, if you aren’t doing a lot of a verb, it’s for the better.
Oh, in that case, I am both always and never monsting, ever since I realized that the only way to truly monst is to absolutely abstain from monsting. If you’re damned if you do and damned if you don’t, what are you when you both do and don’t?
Sorry, you had me at Messer Chips.
some time in the future you’ll be on your way to a restaurant. a piano will fall down in front of you and squish the tip of both your shoes without hurting your toes. then you’ll be refused service for improper footwear. people almost never stand exactly symmetrically, so your feet need to be different sizes so the fronts line up.
I’d like to know what the plan was, giving me the ability to grow a neckbeard only on the right side.
Now I’m worried that I’m inadvertently monsting all the time! But would that be objectionable? Braxton seems to think so, but he doesn’t even know what monsting is. Maybe I should worry that I’m not monsting enough! To monst, or not to monst: I’m at the look for such information.
Cold: Made from the very few Russian potatoes that don’t become vodka.
Bern: Since I live in Portland (where you can get into any restaurant wearing Pringles cans on your feet), I know I’ll only have to deal with this frightening scenario when dining out of town. Guess I’m staying home forever!
Teddi: I mean, there are only so many things that people need to do more often, like drinking water, washing hands, reading Mountain Time, MAYBE exfoliating, etc.
But there’s all kinds of things that they shouldn’t be doing at all. Murdering, cannibalizing, throwing recyclables in the trash, ordering steak more done than medium, texting while driving, sexting while driving, texting during sex, driving during sex, over-exfoliating, pronouncing “etcetera” “exetera,” etc.
Odds are, if you aren’t doing a lot of a verb, it’s for the better.
I say that ‘to monst’ shall mean trying to determine the meaning of a given mountain time comic.
Oh, in that case, I am both always and never monsting, ever since I realized that the only way to truly monst is to absolutely abstain from monsting. If you’re damned if you do and damned if you don’t, what are you when you both do and don’t?