Interested in an appetizer? Well, I, Szarzglarth, deny your request. You humans think you’ve figured it all out, with your large bodies, shoelaces, and appetizers. However, we N’Rangar, who can travel 8.3 light years to Sol from Planet Ub, in the system you call Lalande 21185, know the truth: A proper meal consists of a green salad with a Dijon vinaigrette, a main course of your choosing, and either coffee or port with cheese to finish.
SUBMIT, HUMANS!
Hey.
Chris here. Szarzglarth is new on the job, and it obviously doesn’t understand our culture yet, but I don’t think we understand its culture either. Maybe they don’t have onion rings or stuffed mushrooms on Ub. They are tiny beings; perhaps they are similar to crickets, who love lettuce.
Please give it time.
UPDATE 2
New comic Tuesday.
UPDATE
I had the tremendous pleasure of spending an evening at Urgent Care (I think I’m fine), spent the next night NOT SLEEPING FOR A SINGLE MINUTE, and now I’ve been awake for, like, 40 hours straight. I’m losing my mind and coming up with really weird ideas for comics (but not the good kind of weird), and I don’t really remember what’s happened today.
I know the Browns won and my cat had chicken and gravy for dinner, but what happened to me? I’m lost, drawing comics in my notebook that might not mean anything when I look at them tomorrow (or whenever it is that I’ve slept, which might be never).
From the mush that used to be my brain, goodnight!
True Mountain Time analysis majors will notice the common theme of killing negative space. And by “common” I mean “appears twice”, which is the standard definition of “common” in Mountain Time analysis.
It’s just like the old song says, 50 ways deflate your hover.
Unless you’ve developed a faster-than-light comic delivery protocol, the 8.3 year delay means that mountain time on Ub would be in the middle of the Rats! series at the latest (which coincidentally also included people with an aversion to touching the floor). “Get comics 8+ years in advance” would be a pretty impressive subscription perk
Circle: Obviously, Mountain Time is meant to be a positive space :D
But yeah, I thought the idea of stabbing a canyon (as a rock formation) was funny, but the idea of attacking a canyon (being the absence of rock) is pretty good too.
Cold: I actually only know that song from a tape my cousin gave me from a recording of a very, shall we say, unsavory musical entertainer, so any response I could have is sexually vulgar enough that I don’t want it on my site (feigned decency being better than no decency at all).
But I bet the original is cool.
Whee: Szarzglarth is already here, living in low Earth orbit. Since the N’Rangar are tiny, their ship is only about the size of a Hyundai Elantra, so it goes unnoticed.
That’s okay, I only know it from parody too, just corner stuff like “50 Ways to Love your Liver”
Come to think of it, Veep had a version, “50 Ways to Win in Denver.” But that one’s kind of not sexually vulgar enough for my tastes.
Did you trip and break your sleep bones? I hope they knit soon.
If sleep is bones, I have osteoporosis.
Man it’s just been one thing after another for you recently, hasn’t it? Maybe if all else fails you can just post some of the sketches you’ve ended up with in a collection so they don’t go to waste.
It’s mostly just two decades of living hard coming home to roost. The solution is mostly things like using cooking spray instead of butter, not rolling up and smoking the black mold you find growing behind your damp towels and laundry hampers, and more leafy greens.
The ideas in the sketches will end up being used eventually. Hell, the comic I’m drawing right now is based on an idea from a song I wrote in 2000.
Hey, the onion icon’s back!
And it’s gone. Weird.
That’s weird, and it sucks. I have three Mountain Time bookmarks, and they’re all the mask favicon.